Today, let me introduce you to…
…as well as to how I’d probably reply if I actually heard them uttered by another human being directly to me, providing that I somehow managed not to throw up immediately afterwards:
Your world is very limited, then. Please, go find yourself a hobby. Buy a pet. Anything, please. I can’t function as a whole world to anybody.
How do you know that? Have you been to some ancient oracle, or something?
…Wait. You went to an ancient oracle and didn’t take me with you!?!?!?
Yes you can! Cheer up, boy, and have some pride! You’ve been doing well enough before you met me!
But… how about your mother? Surely, she’s more closely, umm, related to your life… I mean, in itself…
Seriously, come off it. I like you, so I guess neither of us has any business in letting you die.
All that’s not to say I don’t like love songs — many of even the most prototypical ones are great for humming, falling asleep to, or, well, whatever you do without much thinking..