The Terrifying Story of a Girl Who Wasn’t Excited About the New Star Wars Movie

Note: this isn’t entirely based on facts but it could be.

The story begins in the 90’s in a village in southern Poland. Get a blanket to cover your eyes with in fear because it’s terrifying.

The girl spent her young years doing stuff. Reading books, drawing, riding a bike, learning, playing football and computer games. But somehow, she didn’t once have the chance to watch any of the Star Wars movies.

It just didn’t happen. Some things have a way of not happening that doesn’t make them special but it’s still worth noting, or maybe it isn’t.

Then at some point in her life, the girl learned it was odd to never have watched the Star Wars.

“Oh, well,” she thought.

Time passed, and she continued to do stuff. Only it was slightly different stuff ’cause she was older. Not that it’s important, though.

Then at some later point in her life, she watched half of the Star Wars episodes with someone she loved.

“Oh, well,” she was thinking half of the time.

Then the fuss about the 7th Star Wars episode started to intensify all around her, and she could hear it everywhere that the premiere was a big deal, and everyone had to go see the movie, and how much excitement and money it generated.

It seemed sort of stupid to her that some people could earn so much on other people’s media-fueled excitement.

“Oh, fuck it,” she just thought and went about doing stuff.


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I'm an unprofessional writer, reader and translator. I'm also a walking, breathing and listening addict. And I love being all that.

4 thoughts on “The Terrifying Story of a Girl Who Wasn’t Excited About the New Star Wars Movie”

  1. Scary. I hear the girl is around and she looks just like any other girl. Nobody knows who she is. (Thunder clap in the distance.)


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